Coachella

I'm heading off to the desert tomorrow for what's hopefully the first installment of "Calvin goes to listen to an absurd amount of bands under the unrelenting pounding of the California sun." I'm only going for Saturday because of the outrageous price of the tickets, but I think one day will be enough to satisfy my needs. Here are the bands I want to see (in no particular order):

Depeche Mode, Franz Ferdinand, Kanye, Common, The Walkmen, She Wants Revenge, Atmosphere, Eagles of Death Metal, My Morning Jacket, Animal Collective, Cat Power, Ladytron, TV on the Radio, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, Wolfmother, Nine Black Alps, The Juan Maclean, Lyrics Born, Lady Sovereign.

Similar to SXSW, it'll be tough to catch everything, but all the sets are staggered, hopefully making it easier to move from stage to stage. We'll see.




In preparation for a weekend filled with music, I'm going to try and head over to The Roxy Theatre tonight for a "secret" MySpace Gnarles Barkley show. I've been a fan of Danger Mouse and Cee-Lo for quite some time now so the pairing of the two is impressive, to say the least. As many times as I listen to "Crazy," it still makes me want to dance around in my underpants.

When You Love Somebody...

it's hard to think about anything but to breathe. Or so sings dreamboat EJ of the Fruit Bats. Tonight is going to kick off with a trip to the Klong for DJ Fishnchips' Bday dinner. He's turning the ripe age of 29. Then, thankfully, I get to see one of the most pure fun and relaxation show experiences known to date, the Fruit Bats at the Mercury Lounge. Check out this song from the Unreleased and Unheard compilation they are featured on: Fruit Bats - The End

Best Yeah Yeah Yeahs Show Review EVER

Don't take my word for it. I promise you'll split your pants and say "ffwhat???!!" outloud at least four times, maybe six. This dude totally enjoyed the "showgram." Read it here.

Return of the Mac

Last night I found myself at an FHM party at Gypsy Tea. It contained a lot of the pre-conceived elements I was expecting. Girls in tight white t-shirts and short skirts serving mini cheeseburgers, shrimps on sticks and mini crab cakes with an open bar. The thing that was truly hilarious though, besides the fact that Paul from the Wonder Years was there, was this short dude who HAD to have been from Long Island. Maybe the DJ played his Bar Mitzvah, cause he knew every word to every song and had crazy B boy dance moves that looked suspiciously pre-choreographed. He kept tugging on his white blazer, putting it on, taking it off, putting in on, swinging it around, scooting about. The DJ was playing "Return of the Mac," "I Wanna Sex You Up" and "La Isla Bonita" without a lick of irony. Men milling about in suits, it was dudetastic. I'm like wow, you mind as well have been playing this.

i want to tell you something

Awhile back, I saw a news piece about this community art project where people anonymously submit homemade postcards with secrets written on them. The secrets range in degree of seriousness, with weighty confessions like "law school gave me the discipline to perfect my eating disorder," to lighter admittances like "i despise my coworker. i take the candy from her candy bowl and i lick it and then put it back in the bowl," but all are arguably poignant in their own right. Some will make you laugh and smile, but most reflect something more painful and self-effacing.

Recently, I discovered that they made a website for PostSecret and it's completely sucked me in. If you're not familiar with the project, the site is definitely worth a look.

One of these days I may unearth a compelling enough secret to warrant my own submission.......but I guess you'll never know.

Anything Could Happen And It Could Be Right Now....

so make up your mind. Feeling in a much better mood today. The weather is about as good as it gets and I had a delicious free meal w/ good company from the boys over at FHM today. They let me in on some pretty amusing stories about the goings on of that office. I've decided I have to make a visit at some point and partake in their Tiki Bar and power tool/porn collections. Here's an old song from The Clean whose double disc anthology came out on Merge. It's super duper excellent and puts me in a great mood every time. AND they're Kiwis (from New Zealand.) This song in particular is my favorite and matches my mood right now of Anything Could Happen, it's pretty much up to you. With the start of Summer, there are so many awesome fun things that are starting to happen and there is really no time to "break my shoes over you" or anyone else. The cloud of Winter has finally been lifted. It's time for outdoor drinking and good times. I'm totally psyched for my girl's night tonight w/ Dani, Karli, Jeff and Darnold. I know it's kind of an odd file, but just drag it into your iTunes or whatnot, it'll be cool I promise.
The Clean - Anything Could Happen

WOW

Ego

I'm in hatred of most things at the moment. The human ego being the most prominent of them all... douchebaggery and heartbreak close seconds and thirds. However, I am in love with this song. It's currently available on iTunes, but the full release doesn't come out until June 13th. It's a truly great song. I seriously dislike Feist and Joanna Newsom and most of the arsty Pitchfork endorsed crapfulness that people relate her to, but Regina Spektor is incredible. She primarily comes from a background of playing piano solo in the antifolk scene of NYC, but this album features much more guitar and "full band" type features.
Regina Spektor - Fidelity

Lighthouse...

Something about Lighthouses is really romantic, creepy and sad all at once. One of my favorite books is Virginia Woolf's To The Lighthouse and one of my favorite instruments is banjo. I am pretty incoherent right now, haven't had anything other than coconut water in five days. Don't ask. Anyway, Tarkio is nothing new. It's Colin Meloy's college band whose recordings were recently put out on a double disc by one of my favorite labels (see where I'm going here?) Kill Rock Stars. So although it ain't new, I haven't seen much chatter on this release and I do enjoy it. So, I thought I would post a track. It's called "Devil's Elbow" but it's about Lighthouses, not elbows. Go figure. It fits my mood and goes well with Coconut water.
Tarkio - Devil's Elbow

G.O.B.

This post is technically a little late since the weekend officially ended two days ago, but oh well. Sometimes my computer just unexpectedly breaks on me, big whoop wanna fight about it?

After spending Saturday and Sunday on the couch nursing a cold, I came to two conclusions. First, the Kings (my favoritest basketball team in the world) will probably not beat the Spurs. Especially after getting their asses handed to them in game 1 and with Ron Artest getting suspended for game 2 tonight. Uh durp! As much as I heart the team, it's not looking good.

Second, television blows. I have cable and I still couldn't find anything worthwhile to watch. Luckily for me, I had my Arrested Development DVD's on hand to fill the day. GODDAMN, I always forget how funny this show is (R.I.P.). Every time I watch it, I find something new to laugh about. This time around, it was Carl Weathers posing as Tobias' acting teacher. For my money, it doesn't get much better than when he hits on Lindsay and tells her "I buy all my cars at police auctions" in a semi sleazy/totally genuine voice. Oh Chubbs, you've done it again.

Dirty Dewey Decimal Screening

My best friend in the world has a short film showing tonight at the NYC Downtown Short Film Festival. It's called Dirty Dewey Decimal and you should go. It just won the audience choice award at the Starz! film festival in Denver this past week. I'm so proud of her;) It's 10 bucks for 2 hours of short films and is located at Duo Theater 62. E. 4th St. You can buy tix here.

Hahahahaha

My friend Rob is up for the World's Sexiest Vegetarian Award on PETA. Go vote for him. He's up against, like Jared Leto and a bunch of other emo hotties. So, good luck my friend. Vote here. You have to vote for a chick too. I say Alyssa Milano, she was hot on Who's the Boss. Remember that episode when she snuck drank that bottle of wine? That was funny.

Another Fun Thing To Do Tonight

From My Friend Brian:


john waters (yes, john waters) opening tonight at marianne boesky gallery
535 w. 22nd st. between 10th and 11th ave.
right here in the baltimore of the future, nyc.
6-8pm.

booze.

it's amazing and i'll call you a fucking idiot if you don't try to see it if you're in town. the funniest/weirdest thing you'll see this summer and it doesn't even have people slowly flexing their muscles and turning into whales or whatever the hell matthew barney is doing these days.
wait- you heard about it on flavorpill? well, bring your can of sparks, cowboy boots and stupid ass haircut along with you. we're partying.

This Weekend

There are lots of things going on this weekend that will be fun, all else aside. It's Jay's birthday tonight so he will be having some good bands including the Big Sleep over at Fontana's. Going to cut out for a second to head over to the Lansing Dreiden show at midnight at Don Hill's. Then tomorrow is what I'm really looking forward to. Drinking margaritas and guacamole, though it will be raining, at my mom's house (she won't be there) w/ Jeff, Darnold and Christen. Giant sleepover. When was the last time u had a giant sleepover? Shopping list provided by Christen includes: Beef Jerky, Margarita Mix, Tequila, Avocadoes, Coronas and Limes. Mmmmmmmm. Too bad the dude below couldn't make it, I was really crossing my fingers. Sorry Stanley.

+

From one C to another

Feel better duder.

Fuck This...

Band. Really all I mean is fuck this feeling. Whenever I'm feeling not so hot I enjoy a good song with the word fuck in it. This one says it a lot. Do they really say, "fuck this band, fuck their holes?" cause that's pretty amazing.
Mclusky - Fuck This Band

Pass the soap

I spent last night at Cinespace for a film screening of The Proposition, an Australian Western written by Nick Cave, starring Guy Pearce, Ray Winstone, Danny Huston, John Hurt, and Emily Watson. It's an intriguing film that documents gritty, outlaw life in the Outback and pits a British Captain against a family of criminals, the Burns Brothers. Needless to say, there is an abundance of violence, violence, and violence. Perhaps the most valuable lesson I learned was that living in the wilderness leaves absolutely no opportunity to maintain personal hygiene. If I ate a chicken nugget every time I saw someone with greasy matted hair and rotted teeth, I'd be like, really full.

On a somewhat related topic, since my laptop broke, I've been relegated to working off the too too dirty officewide computer. I still can't figure out how a pop tart gets crammed into a keyboard. I may never know....

Fab Site

I had totally forgotten about this website because the last time I checked it out it was still such an upstart, it didn't have much on it. But now it's sort of all growed up and it's pretty cool. Basically, you can watch videos song by song of various artists performing in the Netherlands @ Paradiso. Artists include Arcade Fire, Bright Eyes, Ani DiFranco, Bloc Party, Death From Above 1979, Echo & The Bunnymen, Editors and more... check it ouuuuut: Fab Channel. Um you can also watch the Dutch Air Guitar Championships, if you are so inclined.

Stephen McBean Beauty Queen

I was just listening to this song and figured I would post it. For all the Black Mountain/Pink Mountaintops fans who haven't heard any Jerk With A Bomb etc. I like this song. It's somber and then happy.
Don't Forget Your Love
Also if you are a HARDCORE Stephen Mc Bean fan than you can download pretty much a whole record of unreleased Ex Dead Teenager stuff here. I don't think it's that great, but it's free and if you really want to see where the Bean sprouted, then knock yourself out. I'd suggest "Love Ain't Dead."

New Play

Lately I feel like all I ever do is music music music. It's cool when someone presents me with an easy opportunity to do something else. So.. that being said. This looks pretty interesting. It comes from the writer of the L-word. I love the L-word. It's playing at the Barrow St. Theatre, 27 Barrow St. Here is the trailer.

Naked snow angels

Taking the day off tomorrow to travel up to Lake Tahoe for a college friend's bachelor party. As much as I'd like to go snowboarding, there probably won't be enough time in between drinking and well, I guess drinking. Good Friday? Yes indeed.

Step Up To The Bitch Plate....

and buy some Team Dresch tix!!! Kaia Wilson was officially the first girl I ever fell in love with. I used to have a picture of the two of us hugging on my refrigerator. Not sure where that is now... but anyhow, that's nineties history now. What you do need to know is that they are having ANOTHER reunion show on May 30th at the Knitting Factory. Thanks Paul! Go buy tickets now! I just bought two, I'm really excited. Apparently they are playing Olympia, Seattle, Portland, Brooklyn and Chicago's "Estrojam" (are u kidding me?) as well.

Since we're on the topic of poo.....

This is one of my favorite and in my opinion, totally underrated SNL skits from the last few years. Why you ask? Because I said so. And I just did.

Don't Poo on my Cloud

Edited for funniness:

CE: holy crap do u know the band Final Fantasy? his new album is called He Poos Clouds
CY: literally, holy crap
CE: hahahahahaa I mean did he make up that title just for me
CY: it sounds like a really fucked up indian name
CE: found that out on Dreams of Horses, Dreams of Horses Poos of Clouds
CY: running bear
CE: hahaha totally
Cy: he poos clouds
CE: son, you have reached the age you have become a man, you are now he who poos the cloud, go forth
CY: 'but dad, i wanted to be "spoons with sheep."
CY: "NO. you are he poos clouds!"
CE: i'd like to spoon some sheep right now
CY: i'd like to fork some sheep
CE: mmmm Like that band name I came up with slow hand fast fork?
CY: up with slow hand fast fork? haha i guess you don't need fast hands if your fork is fast
CE: speed metal!
CY: haha damn dude, you're killin' me today
CE: oh no i just realized we're both CH what's yer middle initial?
CY: Y
CE: what's the Y for
CY: it stands for my chinese name, which has no english translation my chinese name means "He Poos Clouds"
CE: that's pretty awesome. maybe one day you can make a record and title it as such.
CY: yeah, i think so

Sir Dude Bradford

So there's this ONE sketchy looking Irish dude who goes by the name of The Jane Bradfords. I've only heard a few songs but I like him because he sounds like all those bands who made sappy downtrodden Brat Pack soundtrack anthems that fueled the fire of the love in my heart for goth music. What? Also, sounds a lot like the Wedding Present who are f-ing great. Here's an mp3 and and a pic. You can also find 2 more songs on his MySpace page.

Hide From The Cold

Ghostride Tha Whip!

For more than a minute now, people from Northern Cali have been doing this thing called Ghostridin' tha Whip. It basically entails getting out of your car while it's still moving, dancing next to it, and getting back in. It usually involves a carload of people and for seasoned vets, they can get on top of the car, roll over the hood, and bust out with more advanced moves. It's part of the now growing Hyphy movement which started in the San Francisco Yay Area among rappers like E-40 and Keak Da Sneak (who coined the term).

I'm hoping to ghostride my whip later tonight which will be interesting, seeing as how I don't own a car but rather a vespa scooter.

In the meantime, see how the professionals do it in E-40's video for Tell Me When To Go."

Nice Summer Days and Sambassadeur Fields...

A new Sambassadeur EP, Coastal Affairs, Is coming out soon, May 3rd on Labrador to be exact. They are perfect music for Springtime weather. There is something so pleasant about a good Swedish band. Sambassadeur are fairly mellow, fuzzy and spacey comparable to the Lilys or Seam. You can download a generous 4 songs from their Myspace page. "New Moon" is probably my favorite, but really I enjoy the whole catalogue.

Parental Advisory Explicit Content

Overheard at the Zoo this weekend:

Boy: "Hey Dad, what's that elephant doing?"
Dad: "Oh nothing. It's just hanging out."
Boy: "WOAH, what is that?"

[the elephant proceeds to squat and take an impossibly large dump]

Boy: "EWWWW, it's going POO!"
Dad: "No no no, it's not going poo."
Boy: "Yeah it is. Look!"
Dad: (in an increasingly rushed tone) "nonono, it's not going poo."

[the elephant finishes dropping the kids off at the pool and starts to flood the ground with gallons of pee]

Boy: "WOAH! OMIGOD. Is it going pee??? Ewwwwww!"
Dad: "No no no no, it's not going pee! Move outta the way!"

[the following 30 seconds involves a chaotic situation with more piss, yelling, and a father's attempt at thwarting his son's understanding of bodily functions]

Hey Dad, when your son becomes thoroughly confused between right and wrong and eventually starts turning tricks at the docks, you'll know why.

Parties and Parades

Saturday night the party was on somewhere along Montrose. Having just moved to BK recently it marks the second party I've been able to ride my bike home drunk from, which is an awesome feeling.Greg was dj-ing which meant that I got to request some songs including the aforementioned Binary Love which I honestly just can't stop listening to. It was good times, people were dancing so hard that my friend Alexis was convinced the floor would bust through as she'd heard of that happening recently. Last night I went to see Wolf Parade for the 5th time. I love love that band, but the sad thing is that the first time I saw them was unfucking believable and ever since it just doesn't have that same riotess awesomeness. It's still always great hearing live versions of songs you've come to love and to watch Dan who as I've said before is like some awesome rock version of Steve Buscemi writhe on stage, but I just always walk away a little bit disappointed. Still, they are wolf and everything else is just dog.

Swingin' from the Gallows

So I was walking through, ahem, Urban Outfitters, cough cough, (while drinking a starbucks on the upper west side mind you. There, I said it) and they started playing one of my favorite Murder City Devils songs. It occurred to me that I had sort of forgotten all about them. That band fucking rules so much it's unbelievable. Deep booming vocals and a blood red Farfisa. They also made the most kickass Christmas song IN THE WORLD, 364 Days. I was working at Insound back in those days, picking and packaging orders for nearly 4 hours every dang day, and would replay that song over and over while Chuckrocksyeah and I would scream the chorus. I find it quite humorous? amazing? unbelievable? that a song can actually make you sympathize with a fictional character, especially one whose sole job is to like, eat cookies and deliver presents while laughing. But that's the fucking POWER OF THE DEVILS.

St. Nicholas, St. Nicholas, at the North Pole

364 days spent all alone

Take off your boots, pour a drink

Try not to cry, try not to think

Try not to think...
When was the last time you went to a show like this?

Woot woot!

Yayyyy, my blogger counterpart finally got his balls out of a bunch and put up his first post! AND it included monkeys and flinging poop, thereby living up to my high expectations of his work. I <3 Calvin. Balls ahoy.
So I finally watched the season premiere of De Grassi and it was goddamned amazing. They finally "went there" and put in the lesbian sequence we've all been waiting for. 16 year old Canadian chicks grinding with each other at a Kevin Smith after party while one takes off her cowboy hat and uses it to bring the other one's face in closer and gaze longingly into her eyes. NIIIICE. Go Canada. I can't wait to see what happens next week and to hear those girls talk aboot their feelings for one another a bit more, eh. In their honor I'd like to post a love song that I can't stop listening to. It makes me feel happy and sad at the same time, just like love and Canada. It's by the Rakes, available on import coming out 4/25 in the U.S. via V2 Records.


The Rakes - Binary Love

El Lay En La Casa

After a long day at work, nothing says relaxation like a three hour tattoo session. I just finished session number five of a still undetermined number of total sessions to get an old piece of work covered up. Word to the wise: being impulsive with a tattoo is not necessarily a bad thing. Being impulsive and letting five different artists from California, Michigan, and New York draw whatever the fuck they want on you is NOT GOOD. Piling shit on top of more shit eventually leads to a gigantic shit sandwich. I had to learn this the hard way.

Fortunately for me, I have the good people at True Tattoo in Hollywood helping me out. Seriously, if you need a reputable shop, go to these guys. I highly recommend either Clay Decker (who's doing my work) or Chris Garver (from Miami Ink fame). You can't go wrong with either guy. Plus they let you smoke in the shop when you're getting inked. Now that's what I call service! Up yours California smoking laws!

On a random side note, I'll be going to San Diego tomorrow to celebrate my friend's birthday at the San Diego Zoo. No, he's not six years old, and yes, I will be flinging my own poop at the monkeys. Update to come.....

Song for you....

I usually hate it when crap-ass bands ask me to be their digital pals on myspace with their generic emails of hi, we think you'd like us bullshit. However, once in a while there is one that's kind of cute and nice and makes generally good tunes. This one was a class project for some kids in Davis, CA. They are called Buildings Breeding and this is their song Stacking Up Reasons

DONT ACT LIKE YOU DONT DO IT TOO

Ok, so once in a while when I'm bored or looking out to the galaxy and wondering what other personages who carry the same namesake as myself are like out there, I find something unbelievably awesome. This is the first time I've ever stuck my name in You Tube to see what gets pooped out, and I have to say it's fucking great. WATCH THIS.

It Goes There

I'm hungover, you're hungover. Let's watch the season premiere of De Grassi The Next Generation on a flat screen while sipping on red wine, FUCK YEAH. If you have never heard of De Grassi then you are sadly missing out. It kicks all that Laguna Beach, O.C. shits' asses on its face. 8 o'clock tonight. I really want the theme song on mp3, so if any of you are total nutbags and know how I might go about getting that, by all means let me know.

Finger On The Cupcake!!

Cupcake?

If I'm not too lazy, I'm going to make cupcakes for this:

International Freakshow

Last night started off by checking out the Serge Gainsbourg cover bands at Hiro. I mostly just went to do something different and because I was curious to see Melody Nelson sing. She seemed a little nervous, but she pulled it off quite well and it was fun to watch her dance around with a tambourine. We left and headed down to The All England Club to hear Chip and Miguel play some awesome remixes like Shy Child's Futureheads remix and Placebo's Freelance Hellraiser remix. It was totally packed. They're really getting it together with Ben Sherman sponsorships and free beer and whatnot. It's a really good time.
Next I headed over to Eastside Co. which is a pretty cool bar on Essex and Grand that I'd never been to before. My friend Kristian was dj-ing with his friend Wes. They could get away with murder and were trying to so it was pretty amusing. They tried to fuck each other up, going song for song with stuff that's pretty impossible to follow. Like... old skool hip hop into Johnny Cash into Belle and Sebastian into the Stranglers WHAT?! It was really fun. And they have delicious fresh mojitos which are a favorite of mine. After they packed up their records we headed over to La Caverna . I had only been there once before, and had walked out. That place is a freakshow and I really don't get what they are going for in there. Last night was apparently some Japanese/Brazillian international pop night with Gogo dancers. In a cave. Some dude who I had seen earlier in the day in the most ramshackle over the top who the fuck do you think you are hipster stonewashed jean suit with shiny white patent leather shoes and asymmetrical weird ass half shaved haircut was there. I was like oh, that's where these kids go. NICE. Bjork, Mathew Barney and Kyp from TV On The Radio were there. I couldn't stop staring at the gogo dancers humping the stalagtites along with the odd japanese soft porn they were projecting and couldn't help wondering what the fuck I was doing there. But, it was awesome to hang out with friends I haven't seen in a while, drink a little too much and just be generally confused in an inoffensive way. Sometimes the city surprises you.

Every Once In A While

you are at work, feeling a little shitty, feeling a lot frustrated and whatnot, and then you get an AWESOME email like this from someone you haven't talked to since like October:


I have not spoken to you in a long while. How is everything going? I would have called, but it's been so long, that I would feel stupid. I know you miss me, even though you have so much going on in your life, and more friends than anyone else. I know something that you will be doing in the near future...
1. Talk to me. Tell me fun stories, tell me about the bf. and why you moved to Brooklyn.
2. You shall be sitting on the beach at the Jersey shore, with me of course, and drink heavily.
3. You will check out my mom's new retaurant and bar which also happens to be down the shore. It doesn't open until Memorial day.
4. I forget
5. I don't know, I guess you get hungry sometimes...
6. Have I ever told you how much I like cheese?
7. Can't stop making stupid list.
So, write me back and tell me what's good, and even what's not so good. I'd love to here it all. Love you and miss you. Much love

... and that's what motherfucking friends are for.

More to do tonight....

Thought I was going to have to miss this... but turns out I don't. Should be lots of fun and I can't wait to hear her sing.

Repost of Awesomeness

Its the motherfucking return of SPARKS

FRIDAY, APRIL 14TH (11pm) IN COORDINATION WITH AMERICAN APPAREL
Lucky Cat (245 Grand btw driggs and roebling)!!with seattle best dj of the year dj fucking in the streets

4 way birthday extravaganza:
Jill
Janelle
Sherene
Ollie
DRINK SPECIALS

FREE SPARKS PLUS 1 am!!!!!!We blow it out williamsburg style!!!

---

Regina Spektor, new songs, plays NYC

Regina Spektor will be digitally releasing 3 tracks off of her upcoming album, Begin To Hope on Tuesday. Fidelity, Better and Summer in the City will be up on iTunes and the like. For now you can hear the amazing tracks streaming here Fidelity is amazing. She will also be playing the same day as those tracks are released at Warsaw in BK. I highly suggest you attend. The last time she played Bowery for 2.5 hours and people all stayed through to the end. Her voice is amazing live and I suggest you see her now before she totally fucking blows up when the record is dropped on June 13th.

All England Club Tonight

My friends are dj-ing a great new Britpop party tonight with free beer and Ben Sherman schwag. Check it out:

Blog Birth

Me: my friend made a blog
7:10 PM
http://the-nervous-system.blogspot.com/
he says it only takes like 20 minutes

we should all just make blogs all day

dude, u and me.

c and c blog factory

Calvin: haha totally

Me: we can post musical musings and IM conversations