Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Ah..... the irony

So yesterday I spent a decent chunk of the day discussing small towns vs. big ones (NYC) w/ Greg. I'm getting sick of the city and contemplating a change of scenery down the road and wondering where that might best take place. Anyway, he was telling me a number of things about small cities. One of which being the inevitable complication, craziness and perversion that come with such a small pool of people sleeping with one another. I think I even went as far as to say, "I wouldn't know" to several of these scenarios. Then, hours later, I find myself at a Hoboken bar to see Brinkman and Daly. It's packed full of Jersey City friends (the city from which I moved not more than 2 months ago) and I'm like holy fucking shit cock damn. How could I have forgotten about this all so quickly? I could have sworn I hadn't experienced that small town shit, except maybe for my brief stint in Colorado. Then, just miles (mile? not far at all from nyc limits) I found myself in a bar with my ex-boyfriend, a friend I'd slept with, my best friend's ex-boyfriend. One of my friends who was there I head-counted had slept with at least 4 people in the room, one of which overlapped with mine. This is a bar full of 20 people. Not 50, not 200. I miss a lot of the things associated with a smaller community with bars where literally everyone knows your name. But at the same time, I can't help but feel ew. The thing about big cities is you can attempt to share both worlds because as intertwined and overdramatic as your neighborhood can become, you know there are hundreds of bars in the city where no one has a fucking clue who you are. I know I'm not saying anything new here, just sort of was a realization that smacked me cruelly upside the head last night. It's funny how quickly you can forget things that used to be so much a part of your life... Cub - New York City


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